This is part two of this post.
So where were we? Just rescued from the side of the freeway, right? Okay….
So I turn the key and…hooray!….we start up. We have gas!
Jubilant in This Change in Situation Mom: Woo hoo! We’re out of here! Off to get some lunch.
A Few Minutes Later, But Still Happy to Be in Motion Mom: Woo hoo. Lunch. I’m hungry.
The Girl: Can you just stop saying that?
Perplexed, but Still Pretty Stinking Happy to Be Going 65mph Mom: Stop what?
The Girl: The “woo hoo”…..it’s annoying.
Well, excuse the heck out of me! Hrmph.
We go to lunch, where The Boy mentions multiple times that The Girl’s pizza looks weird. And did I mention, it looks weird? ‘Cause it looks weird. Weird.
Twitch. Twitch.
They want to stay for dessert, but I can’t hang with that. I offer to drive them through somewhere to get ice cream. I mean kids + ice cream = happy, right? Sure. I made the grave error of ordering myself a Sprite.
The Girl: I want a Sprite too! Can I have a Sprite too please?
The Boy: I need a Sprite!
Mom Who is Now Slightly Less Jubilant: You both got ice cream. I did not get ice cream. I chose Sprite instead. You just had lunch and are now having ice cream. Be thankful for your ice cream and move on!
$9 worth of ice cream and an eternity long drive-thru wait, and we’re on our way! With ice cream!
Two milli-seconds later…..
There is a great thrashing and screaming in the backseat. The Girl has dripped some ice cream down the front of herself. Apparently the ice cream is highly toxic and has penetrated through her clothing and is painfully dissolving her skin. At least that is what I gathered from her hysterical reaction. I remove the offending ice cream to the front cup holder and continue on, only vaguely noting the wails of “Now I’m going to need a bath when we get home! and “It’s all melty! I never get to eat any ice cream!”
Then this…
The Boy: Um, mom? I don’t really like this ice cream. It tastes sort of um, eggy….or like buttercream.
Mom Who is Very Close to a Messy Head Explosion: Then. Don’t. Eat. It. O. K.?
GAH! GAAAAAAAAAH!…………Gaaaaaah!
Then I launched into my mom lecture speech about how they are not acting in a kind or grateful manner…and that possibly, when we got home, it would benefit them to do something in their rooms. Something that didn’t involve me. Something quiet. That didn’t involve me.
And then, from the backseat…..
The Boy: I’m thirsty. Can we stop somewhere and get a drink?
And then my head exploded.
8 responses so far ↓
1 // Jul 9, 2007 at 6:14 pm
Last time I checked, kids didn’t HAVE to be grateful when their parents offer then something and they accept it.
Ed: I will approve this comment so I can point out how you bravely made your comment anonymously. ::eye roll:: It was a story about a frustrating day. I imagine you may have had one of those before. My kids had lunch at a “sit down” place, which they are always happy about….and then I made a special trip to buy them ice cream, which they proceeded to waste and complain about. I think a little graciousness would have been in order. It is my job to teach them that. I do the best that I can. Perhaps consideration, kindness, or manners would have been better word choices than grateful, but I really think you got my point and are just being pernicious. Perhaps you would like to discuss this further using your real identity…..If you don’t like what you see, there is always that little red x in the corner up there.
2 // Jul 10, 2007 at 7:02 am
OH. I hate those days. Hate. And you illustrated yours so perfectly that my almost head exploded at the same time yours did.
3 // Jul 10, 2007 at 7:08 am
Woops. Just read the first comment and oh. my. I would say that kids aren’t always grateful… but they should LEARN to be. And this, I am almost positive, was one of those teaching moments that was a very frustrating time. Big flippin’ deal. If a caregiver didn’t react to that situation and try to let the kids understand that their behavior was not acceptable and they should be GRATEFUL for the special lunch AND ice cream… then she wouldn’t be doing her freaking job. And if a caregiver doesn’t teach that lesson then the world gets to deal with one more spoiled brat who thinks they deserve everything and aren’t grateful for anything.
4 // Jul 10, 2007 at 8:56 am
Oh my God have I been THERE! Especially on our camping trip last week,,, You should have heard my explosion! “I try SO HARD to do nice things for you guys so you can have fun, but you always want just a LITTLE MORE! Nothings EVER GOOD EnOUGH FOR YOU!” I wouldn’t have been surprised to hear myself yell, “No more wire hangers!”
By the end of the trip, I had put us all on a token economy. Brandon earns tokens for not complaining about stuff, Maggie earns tokens for saying things without whining, Melissa earns tokens for being respectful, and I earn tokens for… um…. not yelling. ::red faced::
5 // Jul 10, 2007 at 3:06 pm
Uhhh…do you need some Windex perhaps? Would you like also to borrow my evil eyebrow? The one that could quiet an entire classroom in 3.5 seconds? Just kidding. Well, not about the classroom, but about you borrowing it. I had to read this aloud to the RT. He liked the Gah……part. A lot. Hoots!
6 // Jul 10, 2007 at 10:05 pm
Is it wrong that I laughed at your pain? I can’t believe they even complained about the ice-cream. Man, that would have sent me over the edge.
Wait a minute. Can you even read my comment if your head has exploded?
7 // Jul 15, 2007 at 6:49 pm
FANTASTIC! Loved it.
It was like reading of a drive taken by me.
My son has Aspergers and we home school. I also sometimes have fantasies of slapping that happy little ice cream right out of his flapping little hand!!!!!!!!!
Thank goodness life let’s us laugh at it.
Wonderful, wonderful reflection on your day.
8 moe berg // Aug 17, 2007 at 1:37 pm
i hope you made the kids clean up the mess. an exploded head can be hell on a car’s upholstery.
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