Freak Parade

Why no, I do not have a bazillion things I need to be getting done right this very minute. Not at all. Spending an hour making a completely ridiculous video was an excellent use of my time. Excellent. Click and see for yourself. I have to warn you though…it is three minutes of your life you will never get back. I apologize in advance.

At the end there, I wanted to put “B*tch” instead of “Diva” ….you know, because she is a dog….and you know B*tch means fema….oh, you get it. Right, I’ll shut up. Anyway, I had to use diva because it was really made for The Boy. The Boy, who laughed his wee little head off while watching my handiwork, so I suppose it wasn’t a total waste of time.

Real blog entry forthcoming. Unless I get distracted by something shiny.

So, anyone ever heard of this lady, Mir? She writes this blog called Woulda Coulda Shoulda…..perhaps you have heard of it. Anyway, The Boy interviewed her for his project. It is up at his blog. Thanks, Mir.

Many people have a negative impression of homeschooling overall. I get that. I hear about it. I experience it. Whether it be negative or positive, people usually have an idea in their heads of what kids that are homeschooled are like. The images are either the socially backwards, maybe a little weird kids or the freakishly intelligent, spelling bee prize winning child prodigy. As parents we are constantly judged on our choices, but with homeschooling still being less than mainstream, the judgment can seem to be cranked up a notch. For many homeschooling families, the judgment can even come from inside their own families. Thankfully, we have avoided that. For the most part, our family is supportive.

When it comes to homeschooling The Boy, sometimes the pressure to make him fit a certain image can creep in and threaten to overpower my common sense. Because of his Asperger’s Syndrome, The Boy may struggle in social situations, perpetuating the myth, in some people’s minds, that homeschooling causes kids to be socially awkward. In a similar vein, The Boy is very intelligent, but has some learning difficulties that can make relaying his knowledge in many of the ways traditionally expected in a school setting, a struggle. He also hates anything having to do with school. Traditional school, homeschool, whatever. He hates it. Needless to say, that makes our day to day lessons a bit…well….a lot….a whole, whole lot…difficult. At least once a day week, I find myself in the fetal position throwing my hands up, wondering if we can make this homeschooling thing work. How quickly I forget that every single night, that The Boy was in traditional school, played out the same exact way, as we struggled to complete homework…for hours. But I don’t want to dwell too much on the fact that The Boy reacts to being presented with a math worksheet as if he were being asked to surgically remove his own arm without anesthesia…..My point was, that when asked about being homeschooled, or school work, or what he is learning, The Boy’s reaction is not exactly the one people expect. Unless of course hissing is what they expect, but I somehow doubt that. This immediately brings up either, the peculiar looks, or sometimes even the straight out comments about how perhaps he would like to go to (traditional) school better. Because of his hatred for all things educational, you won’t find him reading encyclopedias, winning spelling bees, or solving complex math equations in his spare time. That pretty much shoots the second homeschooler stereotype out the window. Look at us, breaking down stereotypes. Yep. We’re good like that.

Unfortunately, The Boy veers sometimes, into the first stereotype. Yeah, the socially awkward one. And I let it get to me. I let it bother me that people may assume that his behaviors are due to homeschooling. I let it bother me that people see his behaviors and judge him at all. And I worry and I fuss, and sometimes I am too hard on him. As if my staying on top of things can make him be anything other than himself. And then of course I am ashamed for even considering trying to make him be something different, because he is perfect and unique just the way he is. And I’ve sort of lost my focus here, but I guess my point is….Bah. Parenting can be hard. Homeschooling can be hard. But both are made unnecessarily more complicated if you allow yourself to pay any heed at all to the judgment of others. I’ve made a deal with myself to block out that judgment when it starts to get to me. From now on, I am just going to do the best that I can and I will let The Boy do the same…and anyone who has a problem with that? So be it.

My Christmas present from The Husband arrived today. Yes, it was a couple of days late, but it was worth the wait. A beautiful, shiny Canon EF 50mm f/1.8 lens for my beloved camera. Did that sound like a foreign language to you? Me too. I have no idea what most of that means, but I know it takes pictures like this…..

I will learn how to use my fancy camera if it kills me. So, how about you? Did you have a nice Christmas….or better yet…have any photography or Photoshop tips to share?

Apparently, this is how The Girl plays Barbie.

Look at Wendy Waters watching in the background. Creepy.

Okay, aside from the fact that Barbie is on the john….is that the ugliest outfit you have ever seen or what? It’s like some kind of 80’s flight attendant outfit.

So about nine million years ago, The Boy and I squared off on the issue of his messy room. You all voted and gave very well thought out suggestions. All big improvements on my approach to dealing with his pig sty of a room, which was banging my head against the wall and muttering obscenities under my breath. Before I post the pictures of what his room looks like now, I want to address a few things.

Many people noted that there was a lack of proper storage space in his room. Ah, but that is not so. All storage options were buried in his filth…..and you will see that in the new photos.

Many people mentioned that it was too overwhelming for him to be expected to clean on his own. You would be right. The Boy has never ever (Never in his life. Never ever ever. Did I mention Never?) cleaned his room on his own. That was my beef. I was at my wit’s end with helping him clean up his room, only to have it look like a hurricane hit it a day later. When the first set of photos were taken, it was only a week or so after his room had been gutted and cleaned top to bottom to fit in that evil futon. Which brings up another point mentioned….yes, his room is a wee bit crowded. That was his choice. He wanted that futon, that had been living in a box in the garage, in his room in the worst way. After a full 4 hours of assembly (the manufacturer had included the wrong bolts), and another couple hours of furniture Tetris, is was in. He was happy. He began calling his room “The Lounge.” The creation of “The Lounge” was part of his birthday present. We painted his room and hung posters as well. But still, a few days later, the filth returned to “The Lounge.” We needed a way to get The Boy to keep his mess at a manageable enough level for him to clean up himself.

So? What does his room look like now?

Look! No filth! Are you admiring my fantastic leopard print jammies?

And Look! Storage!

Quite a difference from this, isn’t it?

“The Lounge” and its host….

It’s been about a week, and the room still looks pretty close to what you see in the pictures. Why, you ask? How did we convince him to keep it clean? Well, both The Boy and The Girl were told that not a single present would be opened on Christmas morning if their rooms were not clean. While this is working for the short term….then what? Well, we have purchased a present for The Boy….one that he desperately wanted….one that I have been dragging my heels on……That present? Will only be accessible to him when/if his room is clean. Period. Will it work? We shall see. But for right now, I am going to go hang out in “The Lounge.”

Okay, so I know I said I would update on Mondays…and it’s Monday….but I’ve been doing this…..

And this….

And about a bajillion of these….

I do have several things I want to get written. The results of The Great Debate with pictures, some things about homeschooling and Asperger’s Syndrome, and the awful thing I did to The Boy a few days ago….all coming soon….it’s just so darn close to Christmas. Eight days to be exact.

So, how is it going with you? Do you have all of your shopping done? Baking? Presents Wrapped? Are you ready?

Kellypea from Kellementology, ever the optimist, tagged me for another meme. Even though I only complete every third one or so, she keeps thinking of me. Gotta’ love that. So I figured it was about time I actually completed one. This one seemed like an easy one…then I got started and realized that eight things is kind of a lot. I think perhaps I will start the “one thing” meme. Quick! tell me one thing about yourself! Done. See? Wouldn’t that be nice? Perfect for someone with a short attention span like me. But this was not the NEW! One Thing Meme! So I tried to come up with eight things for each category, but for some it just wasn’t happening. So here is my sometimes eight, sometimes seven, sometimes six things meme. I was planning to write a bit about The Boy and Asperger’s, and people’s expectations about homeschoolers, but it will have to wait because I have 16 bracelets to make this week. My beads are calling….

8 6 things I’m passionate about:

1. God
2. Doing what is best for my kids.
3. Doing my research. No matter what it is…homeschool curriculm? Chocolate cake recipe? Medication? I research it to death. I am a semi-expert on many, many inane things.
4. Sleeping in.
5. My laptop.
6. Random things at random times…see number 3 above.

8 things I say often:

1. For real?
2. LEAVE! THE CATS! ALONE!!!
3. I’m not saying….I’m just saying.
4. Y’know?
5. Whatever.
6. Dude.
7. My kids’ names…..usually with their middle name….loudly….followed by Stop that! or That is not appropriate! or What do you say?
8. Freakin’

8 books I’ve read recently:

I love reading, and used to do it all the time. Lately, I haven’t had chance to read just about anything.

1. Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein
2. School Success for Kids With Asperger’s (currently trying to finish)
3. the Bible
4. The Lorax by Dr. Suess
5. Stuck Duck, Frog Cops, Fish Gift, and Elk Yelps (The Girl just finished her first set of readers)
6. Olivia
7. Insert book about Asperger’s here. There have been many.
8. Insert book about homeschooling here. There have also been quite a few of these.

8 things I want to do before I die:

1. See my kids grow up and be happy.
2. Go to Italy.
3. Raise alpacas.
4. Learn how to be a decent photographer, and have an exhibition of my work.
5. Have a business that is actually successful.
6. Celebrate my 50^th wedding anniversary.
7. Travel the country in an RV with my husband (Man, I am getting old…)
8. Learn how to swing dance.

8 songs I can listen to over and over again, and probably have:

The songs being listed here doesn’t necessarily mean they are good songs….just song could listen to again and again….

1. Jackson – Johhny Cash and June Carter Cash
2. Sweet Home Alabama – Lynrd Skynrd (why yes, I am white trash, thank you for noticing)
3. Lie in Our Graves – Dave Matthews Band
4. Feel Like Makin’ Love – Bad Company
5. Paul Revere – Beastie Boys
6. The Tide is High – Blondie
7. Son of a Preacher Man – Dusty Springfield
8. Blood on the Ground – Incubus

And so many more…..I could fill an entire meme just with songs, but I am afraid it would be even more boring than this already is.

8 6 things that attract me to my friends:

1. A slightly twisted sense of humor.
2. The ability to engage in intelligent conversation. (No, really! I can speak intelligently every once in awhile. Why are you laughing?
3. The ability to appreciate sarcasm.
4. A healthy appreciation for food…especially dessert.
5. Some of them have crazy karaoke skills.
6. Did I mention food?

8 7 things I learned in the last year:

1. That as soon as you turn 30, your metabolism comes to a screeching halt. And I do mean screeching. No warning, smoking tires screeching.
2. That I have no self-discipline. At all. None.
3. That two cats mysteriously crap about 10 times more than only one, not just twice as much.
4. That it is possible to homeschool my kids (and spend every waking minute with them) without killing them….or mailing them to Yemen. Okay, so I may threaten the Yemen thing every once in awhile, but still….
5. That after 6 years of marriage, nine years of being stuck with each other, and 17 years of knowing each other, my husband is still my best friend.
6. That people die and it sucks.
7. That people say incredibly insensitive things when someone dies.
8. That trying to do a meme at almost four in the morning does not make for good writing….and the impressions that a keyboard leaves on your face after you nod off, face down for a bit, are not very attractive.

I don’t tag people for memes, but I am going to ask that anyone who reads this plays along with the NEW! One Thing Meme! Add one random thing about yourself in the comments. At the end of the week, I’ll pick a random winner to receive a handstrung beaded bracelet…made with love (*snort*) by yours truly. Shoot, I’m already making 16, what’s one more? So, come on….let’s get lazy (wo)man’s meme off the ground here. Comment away.

“I want to spend time with family and friends, even if they sometimes drive me crazy. Really crazy…..”

Scratch that, Santa.

Make that…I would like to spend time with some members of my family. The rest are crazy. Crazy. As well as frustratingly passive-aggressive, but whatever. Merry Christmas, indeed. Hrmph.

So, I just don’t get the whole passive-aggressive, non-confrontational thing. What’s up with that, people? If I have some sort of issue with someone, or something to say, I say it. Sometimes I may come off as somewhat opinionated (could you hear The Husband snorting at that understatement from where you sit, reading this?), but at least you always know where you stand with me. As I have matured (snort…this time it was me), I don’t just go around spewing my opinions, but if you ask me, I will give it, and give it honestly. I will not say things about you to others that I would be ashamed to tell you myself. I try to adhere to a policy of not discussing The Husband’s family on my blog, but holy moly, sometimes I do not understand the way they operate. Certain portions of it anyway.

So? How do you cope with…er, celebrate with family over the holidays without your head exploding?

Dear Santa:

I have been very good, sort-of good, decent, passable this year. With that said, I’m not asking for much this year, but there are a few things I’d really like……

This year, I want to take every opportunity to enjoy the holidays.

I want to watch corny movies.

I want to build memories with my kids.

I want to bake cookies…..make ornaments….look at Christmas lights….drink hot chocolate….teach my daughter the words to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer….read the Christmas story from the Bible….actually light the candles that I decorate with, instead of trying to keep them looking nice….I want to spend time with family and friends, even if they sometimes drive me crazy. Really crazy…..I want to attend the Christmas eve service at church, and sing carols by candlelight…..I want to throughly enjoy another year (maybe the last) of my kids believing in Santa.

Oh, and I would also really love some good chocolates, a pair of jeans that actually fit, and a Wii.

Love:

Mel

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Dear Blog:

Christmas is calling…..I have so much I want to do, and only so much time. Something’s got to go. So, from now until January, I will only be posting once a week. For the next few weeks, I will be seeing you on Mondays. Stat counter be damned!

Love:

Mel

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If you have a minute, go read The Boy’s letter to Santa here. It is short but sweet.